the ties that bind

this morning was the aids walk in ny. i was out doing my 6 miles as people started showing up in the park. they were arriving by car, by car with driver, van, public bus, private bus, stroller, wheelchair, scooter and bicycle. it was incredible to see how many people were going to walk and see the smiles and excitement on everyone's face.

but what struck me the most were the different types of people who made the commitment to walk. they were young, old, male, female, black, white, asian, latin, disabled, gay, straight. to think back a few decades when aids first appeared and it was labeled the gay disease. and to now see how it's a disease many are living with and many are seeing the need to raise funds to support these people and also for a cure. 

so what i saw today and what touched me so is what i've been saying for a long time - give people a common goal or dream and that desire rises above the differences people may have. here is a cause many people have been touched by and can see there is the need to help. that need is the commonality people share. i watched the people getting ready to enter the park at the base of the giant keith haring balloon. the balloon of the baby with a heart...and i saw all the people there with just as giant a heart.

wwcd: if we can focus on the similarities, the differences don't seem as great

the betty effect

to all the people who think facebook is a waste of time, i think betty white and her fans may disagree. after a much publicized and successful campaign to convince snl to have betty host, she did an amazing job last saturday night. at 88 1/2 she's still as fiesty and irreverent as i remember and loved her on mary tyler moore and the golden girls. i hope i grow up to be just like her!

but this isn't me gloating or feeling good about being a part of the facebook campaign, it's about what a friend of mine posted today that i wanted to share and let you think about.  she wrote: 

i am happy i had some small part in getting her (betty) there when i joined that facebook group.  go betty! now what else can we make happen?

i love the idea of a grassroots effort succeeding. obviously, there are much more important things we can achieve if we work together than getting betty a hosting job. we can look at issues that are large or small, important or humorous, and challenging or easy.  a problem with a solution. there are certainly enough problems from which to choose. start small, start local...find one where you have an emotional tie. start in your house or in your city. be a role model for your child or be a mentor to a child you don't know.  

wwcd: what are you willing to do to improve a situation?

what comes first?

it's been over a week since i've had or made the time to write. busy at work and busy at life. seems like this time of year is hectic for everyone. i've made it to most events i planned on going to, but unfortunately a couple were casualties of my exhaustion. with all of your commitments, what gets your attention and what falls off the chart?

i remember a few years ago when a friend's husband was thinking about going back to school to get his masters degree and he was on the fence about making the commitment. when he asked his mother-in-law her opinion, she said, "the two years will pass whether or not you go to school." she was right. he went back to school, the two years passed and instead of wishing he had the degree, he had it. he made it a priority.

my 40s were a challenging time, but i made a couple of very good personal and career choices. the irony is that while making most of these choices i didn't put myself first....ever. now at 50, i'm making me more of a priority. it's been an interesting challenge putting myself first and not letting everything else fall through the cracks. 3 months ago i was finally inspired to change my unhealthy lifestyle. i've changed how i think, breathe, eat, move and laugh. the 3 months have passed and all the changes have just become what i do now. 

wwcd:  the pitfalls and success stories next

the next stage

it's been hard motivating lately to write. so many different things going on in my life, in my mind. many of the thoughts and realities are very good. i'm still enjoying my new way of living...the stairs have been somewhat replaced with jumping jacks. walking is still as therapeutic as ever and especially with this perfect ny weather.

zach is in a great place - enjoying the final bits of middle school with so much excitement about entering high school. i'm loving his happiness and listening to his enthusiasm. high school next year. how did that come so soon? seems as though he just started kindergarten at dalton. standing in front of that red door on 91st street. wanting to be the first one in the building. 4 years of wanting to be first. then at the end 3rd grade feeling the need to move on to bigger space. being so ready for a bigger building.

8th grade seems to feels like 3rd. the need for bigger and more, but this time the more is more thinking, more challenges, more choices. when zach describes computer science or traveling to beijing or 12 labs per week, i know it's time for school to grow and keep up - just as it did from 3rd into 4th. but the changes and challenges that will present themselves in the next 4 years are great and filled with such opportunity.

wwcd: going to enjoy and embrace the new age and stage as i've done for all of them so far

thump, thump, thump

when you believe in something so deeply and you see it so clearly, how long do you bang your head against a wall until others get it? i believe in consensus building. i also believe in mandates. we may agree on a timetable when the tenor of the request changes, but then again we may not. 

i admire obama. his style. his patience. his intelligence. i've been frustrated with how long he allows discussions to go on - sometimes to the detriment of progress. so, my head hurts from banging it against the wall. do i keep banging, change my tactics, or bow out of the conversation?

i really want out, it feels like a draining dead end, but quitting is not in my vocabulary. i'm forgetting to mention my cohorts in this crime who make the majority of this journey worth it. in the midst of the craziness i lost track of them yesterday and tonight i want to put them first. i'm very lucky to have them in my life.

wwcd: guess i'm going to keep banging for a while longer